Yes, you are likely encountering a coordinated pickup artist (PUA) or incel-inspired script, not a random trend. These men use rehearsed lines like "I like your style" to initiate contact, then follow with confusing or nonsensical comments designed to test your patience and lower your defenses. The goal is often to pressure you into a conversation where they can escalate toward a sexual proposition, relying on persistence and confusion rather than genuine connection.

This behavior stems from online communities that teach men to treat women as targets for manipulation, often framing rejection as a numbers game. The script is intentionally disorienting to make you doubt your own judgment. The persistence is a tactic: they believe that if they keep talking, you might eventually give in out of exhaustion or social pressure. It is not about logic or attraction; it is about wearing you down.

Practical steps you can take:

  1. Trust your instinct. If a conversation feels off or invasive, you do not owe politeness. A firm "I'm not interested" or "Please leave me alone" is enough. You do not need to explain or justify.
  2. Set clear boundaries. If they continue, say "Stop talking to me" and walk away. Do not engage with their questions or comments; that is exactly what they want.
  3. Change your route or environment. If you notice the same men repeatedly, avoid that area or time of day. Report persistent harassment to the police or university security if you are on campus.
  4. Seek support. Talk to friends or join local women's groups (e.g., on Facebook or WhatsApp) to share experiences and identify patterns. Utrecht has active communities that discuss street harassment.
  5. Consider reporting. If you feel unsafe or the behavior escalates, file a report with the police (non-emergency number: 0900-8844). They may not always act on single incidents, but multiple reports can lead to patrols.

Tradeoffs to consider:

  • Confrontation can sometimes escalate aggression, so prioritize your safety over being right. If you are alone or in a quiet area, it may be better to ignore and move away quickly.
  • Not reporting means the pattern continues for others. But reporting can be emotionally draining and may not lead to immediate change. Choose what feels right for you.
  • Some women find it empowering to loudly call out the behavior (e.g., "I know this pickup line, please leave me alone") in public. This can shame the man but may also attract unwanted attention.

How to evaluate your options:

  • Practice a short, firm response beforehand so it feels automatic. For example: "I am not interested. Do not talk to me."
  • If you want to help others, consider sharing your experience anonymously on a local forum or with a women's safety group. This helps build a map of where these approaches happen.
  • For long-term change, support organizations that educate about consent and street harassment, like Stop Straatintimidatie or local initiatives in Utrecht.

You are not alone, and this is not your fault. The script is designed to confuse, but now you know the pattern. Trust yourself and prioritize your peace.